Multi Maiden: Is happiness a sin?

Hello, olá! Wipe your tears, my dear readers, here I am! How are you doing? Summer started yesterday in Brazil and it seems I’m in a solar mood, so, I decided to update this blog after centuries of silence! Yes, I’m fine. Does my heart still ache? Yes. But life goes on and I have many reasons to feel happy. By the way, I will write about happiness.

Some people are discriminated because their look is not according to some patterns. Some others, because of their ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, music taste. Everything can be an excuse. Because the ones who discriminate and bully are unhappy, frustrated and cannot accept the diversity of humanity . The problem is that humanity will always be diverse (I think I don’t need to warn my smart readers about it, but this sentence contains irony!) and life’s getting harder to bullies and bigots, because people who used to me ashamed to be who they really are, are changing their minds!

As you already know, I’m a woman . I’m also black, mixed and South American. According to some (stupid) people, I belong to four “minorities”. And, yes, I’ve already heard a lot of bullshit (Ops! Sorry …) because of this. But the main reason for me to be discriminated has nothing to do with gender, ethnicity and nationality. I’ve always been discriminated because I’m happy . Rainbows are very happy things, don’t you think?! *lol*

Are you shocked? How many happy people do you know? What’s happiness in your opinion, my dear reader? (Philosophy homework. Please, send me your answers by email!) This is very personal, I know. But some people just feel fine to be alive and find many reasons to smile. I am one of this people. “I’m only human, of flash and bones I’m made” (Have you ever heard this cheesy song? If you’re around my age, probably …). I feel sad (take a look at my previous post), depressed, hopeless. But I’ll always find a reason to smile! Don’t ask me why or how. I’m alive and think this is a blessing. Despite of all the terrible human beings I’ve met, I still love people and think this is a beautiful world. Sunny days touch me. Rainy days touch me. There’s beauty everywhere. I have food to eat, clean water to drink, a job, a nice apartment to live in, a family, great friends. I’m good looking and super humble . Happiness to me is to feel in peace, no matter what happens. I relate happiness to inner peace, to that capacity that we have to see beyond the limitations. Sometimes I can’t be in peace, but I always respect my moments. Beyond all the pain, there’s a reason to live. Maybe my beliefs help me to have this vision. I’m spiritualistic, very influenced by the Buddhism. If you are kind to the world, sooner or later it will come back to you. Everything you give, my dear reader, comes back to you! I just can’t be depressive, unhappy, frustrated. Sad, sometimes. But never the kind of person that puts everyone down. At present, I’m listening to music. a beautiful Brazilian song called Dois Rios (Two Rivers), by Skank, my favorite Brazilian band. It’s a love song, one of the most beautiful lyrics I’ve ever seen! If I pay attention at this song, I will cry. Because beauty touches me! Really. And I feel happy because I understand, deeply, what beauty means! Usually when I listen to Brazilian music, I smile and say: “Que lindo!” (“What a beautiful thing!”). I honestly think I don’t have the right to be in a bad mood with so many beautiful things in this world, just waiting for my attention! Again: I’m human. To be in a bad mood happens to me, too. But it’s rare. It explains why did all my friends get desperate during my previous relationship. I stopped to smile and feel pleasure.

I can’t be rude to people. I can’t complain, only if I’m too sad or upset. I can’t hate. I can’t think that other human beings are inferior or my enemies just because they look different or have other beliefs. All my things are cute and colorful. I usually only have good and positive things to share. I’m ironic and sarcastic, but if you pay attention at my words, you will see love behind them. I am made of love . And believe me, I’ve always been discriminated because of this! Here in Brazil, this “cheerful country”, where dozens of people are killed a day without a reason. A lot of Brazilian people are not cheerful and lovely, ok?! Forget this stereotype. And, for a strange reason, unhappy people hate happy people. If you don’t think that life is a complete shit, they will try to destroy you! First you will be ridiculed. Then, attacked. If you survive, they will leave you alone. I survived. At college, I met a woman and she gave me a very cute nickname: princesa alegre (cheerful princess) . Her goal was to ridicule me, she hated me. I am really cheerful and so many people call me “princess”, since I was a baby, that I’m starting to believe that there must be some royal blood in my veins. Maybe mom had an affair with prince Charles and didn’t want to tell me. She was probably drunk, but it doesn’t matter. Maybe I have a place in the British Royalty and I’m here in Brazil, my dear readers, working to survive! This is so absolutely unfair! … (Wait! I’ll wipe my tears …) But, yes, “princess”, in this case, means spoiled, alienated, stupid. Daddy called me princess too! But he was my king, so, that’s ok!^^

Spoiled I am. By everybody. Or almost. Some people don’t want to cooperate, it’s terrible … Rolling on the floor laughing I don’t know if I have an explanation. But should I refuse to be spoiled? If people like to be kind to me, they have a reason: I’m kind to them. Maybe I’m cute, too, and it helps me. So what?! I really like to be spoiled! By the way, spoil me too, my dear readers! You will be rewarded Smile . Should I feel sad because people are good to me?! Should I call them names? It doesn’t happen to everybody, but it’s not my fault. Some people are rude to others and want love in return! Some people don’t want to be loved or cuddled. I want. I’m not stupid! And I honestly believe that if there were more loving people in this world, life would be much better! And, hey! Not even Mrs. Princess here escape to be treated like rubbish sometimes, ok?!

Alienated. I’ll skip this one. I don’t need to hate everybody to have a critical vision of society.

Stupid. LOL

My universe is made of pretty things . You can see it by this blog. And I’ve not even started to share my universe with you here! Maybe I felt intimidated somehow. When people try to convince you that you’re wrong because you’re happy, you need to struggle to keep your principles. At college, I realized that cuteness can be rebellion too. When I noticed that my way to be was irritating to unhappy people, I confess I became cuter. My homework was cute, full of drawings and stickers, ask my Italian teacher! Ask my classmates. Some people reacted bad. But many people smiled. Cuteness can be futileness. Yes, I agree. When I see some Hello Kitty fans, I think about to move to Mars. But, at least, they are loving. Hello Kitty is cute, face it! And if someone loves you, babe, you will smile when you see her! I am not exactly a Hello Kitty fan (well, I know, I have no alibis, my home is a Hello Kitty fortress, but hey! I don’t spend all my money on it!). But I love her. And sometimes I need to hear some “funny” comment about it. By strangers who think they are so nice because they’re bitter. And I have an excellent answer. Or question: “Do I pay my Hello Kitty items with your money?” Money means a lot to bitter adults! Cuteness means love too. Beauty. I like it!

I’m not childish because my way to express myself is cute and loving. I don’t need to offend your mother, my dear reader, if I disagree with you (here in Brazil, mothers are the main victims of offenses!). I don’t need to be rude. I am sweet. I can’t help it! I am educated, I hardly say bad words. Once I had an affair with a guy and he used to piss me off dozens of times a day because I didn’t say bad words. Which is unfair, because I called him a thousand names in my mind … I don’t need to be gross, arrogant, rude. This year was particularly difficult to me because I had to face the most terrible people I’ve ever met. And all of them wanted to punish me because I’m happy, cute and sweet. I am considered “weak” by some “progressive” people, for instance, because I don’t need to kill who have different opinions. I think that other human beings are not my enemies. They can be unbearable, of course, but I just need to stay away from them. And be loving with the ones who are open to this!

Could you understand me? It’s complicated to talk about my own emotions. On 2013 I had to be very strong to keep my principles. I made nice friends, got in touch with lovely people (special thanks to my brother and close friends, to Harri, Jarmo, Dennis, Michael, Felippe, André, Ashley, Anna-Maria, Matti and all the great people I had the luck to meet this year!), but I also experienced a real hell in my life. I met very unhappy people. Rude, frustrated. And, for a strange reason, they believe that they are the owners of the revolution. Well, if we see revolution as destruction, yes, they are right. Only hate, unhappiness and frustration can destroy. But I believe in a real revolution. Made by love. Dear reader, you are alive. You can read. You have a whole world at your disposal. I’ve always written this on my blog! Life is precious, it’s a blessing! Listen to good music, enjoy a good company, hug your family and friends, say to them that you care! Smile when you see cute things or people! Be kind! Stop complaining, start thanking! Stop hating, nothing will change because you hate! But love can transform everything! I want to start a revolution, actually, I’ve already started it. Being who I am against all odds. Once, an ex-boyfriend said to me: “It’s impressive that you can still smile, despite what you lived!” Yes, I can. Because life is bigger than pain. Because sunny days are beautiful. Because estrogonofe de legumes is good. Because (some) men are hot. Because kids are cute. Because music is amazing and Hello Kitty is lovely and Luna is a bright light shining upon the darkness!

For the complete desperation of my “enemies”, I’m still happy. Still cute. Still sweet. Still a princess. A Disney princess. The gates of my pink castle are open to the ones who have love in their hearts, so, welcome, if it’s your case! I promise to be unbearably cute from now on! This is my way to protest. I’m tired of a world made of rude, evil and boring people! I’m starting a revolution, comrades! Don’t be a pain in the ass, be loving! Don’t ask people to avoid you, be kind! Shut the f*** up about how unhappy you are and look around you! Stop discriminating happy people because they will rule the world! And you will be slaves obligated to make Hello Kitty dolls all day long, listening to cheerful camp songs!